Ik liebe die Niederlands. (That was so Dutch-germanic English) It is the most beautiful country I have ever seen, and wholly different from the beauty of countries like Scotland. I can’t even compare them because they are so different. Lochs and glens, nee, we have flat plains with canals abound… it’s just a different world. I didn’t take as many photos as I thought I would… FS took like 2wice as many as I did. I got about 236. I am going to get my Phlog up when I have time for people like my mommy who don’t want to sift through 1k plus photos. Totally understood. But wenn du willst, you can see them on my webshots. Actually, I’m going to wait a while to upload them because my internet is suffering and it could take uhm a long time to do them. I will hopefully do them with my other coming photos! I’m planning on going to Weimar this weekend (Midd trip) and then Berlin/Munich to round out the month of November. 
I have to say that without Fang Shi I would never have so much fun. It’s kinda cool having a travel buddy for five months. We get down time in Mainz, but it’s nice to have someone to see things with. He likes it too, so he can provide his family with about 150 photos of himself for every trip. Hahahaha… I will one day become a professional photographer, and it’s his doing!
We saw a lot of the train on our trip but it was nice though. Sometimes just sitting and thinking is my favorite thing to do. I’ve been doing a lot of it lately, and it’s been nice to be alone with my thoughts. I think today’s culture is too much go-go-go (as my mother would say). It’s nice when you just chill out a bit. Don’t worry about the future, be content with what you have.
I think that this past weekend was perhaps the best of my life because I think I grew a lot, emotionally and mentally. It’s hard to really explain, especially in so few words… but it just was a time of understanding for me. I had a great backdrop too, and I think that I am the most content of my entire life.
I use the word content, rather than happy, because I think that content portrays the feeling of not wanting more. That’s really how I feel. All the madness of any life behind me is that– behind me. I feel great and I feel good. Even when I feel sad, I feel happy. I feel like my problems are smaller, and yet rather than doing the typical human thing of resizing problems to be huge, no matter how small they are… I just enjoy the fact that my biggest problems are taking the wrong train on my vacation and having to spend an extra hour sitting on a train and spending my time thinking and being happy. Quel problem!
I think too… that suddenly within the last few weeks, I have this resurgence of love for French. It’s like I see it in a different way. I just don’t know that I could deal with French people. They’re so…. eeew. Arrogant? That doesn’t even cover it.
Gahhh… Europe is so amazing and fascinating, and I think the best part about it is that I don’t have to understand to appreciate.
I guess the most important thing about this weekend was that I am starting to figure out what I want from life. I think it changes a lot… and often.
Perhaps also, it’s hard to define who you need in your life. I think that friendship/love is one of the most difficult things to define. When is someone an acquaintance… but when is s/he a friend? I find that I am so open to people that I don’t know it. I think I finally feel how open I am to others, and that it is even perhaps abnormal. I don’t know how to not be open with people I guess. I think I figured that out this weekend. And talking… goodness I love to talk.
It is perhaps the greatest way for me to bond… short of silence, with deep understanding. It reminds me of When Harry Met Sally. You know? “It is so nice when you can sit with someone and not have to talk.” Exactly, Harry. Exactly. You know I don’t think I ever understood that statement until now. Und jetzt weiss ich genau.
I think I’m re-examining my definitions of comfort, and it’s good.
I’m sorry that this sounds like a crazy mischmash of info, I’m a bit scattered atm. I’m also sorry that I can’t type properly in English… I guess it’s a side effect.
Just know that I’m having a great time-every day. I love this semester… every second. I don’t know if I’ve ever been happier, or more content. I just hope it’ll be this way next semester…. or better yet, for the rest of my life
much love to all… Thanksgiving is coming… and I’m already quite sad that I’ll miss it. *siiiigh* You don’t know what family means til you don’t have it no more.
xoxbisousxox
